Being German in a foreign country can be difficult at times, specifically when you are constantly reminded of historic events that lie more than 60 years in the past.
But what is it like being an ex-pat German returning to Germany? Should be easy. Cos your German. So, you should be fine. It's your culture and your people.
But what if I am not???
I have been discribed as a "cosmopolitain", a citizen of the world, with a very open and broad mindset; as someone for whom it is natural to adapt to different cultures and peoples.
But what if this time I can't adapt to a culture - my native culture - because I have outgrown it?
And what if all the stereotypes I have been trying to defer in my lessons actually hold true? What if I - the ex-pat of almost 9 years - now find that those stereotypes actually are real???
At this stage, being in Germany for only four days, I feel confused and in limbo. I had to switch to autopilot the minute I got here because I had sooo many things to organize and register for....a nightmare. I just wanted to scream and run away but obviously I couldn't.
The Germans I have met so far are soooooo German: they are always right, they take everything sooooo seriously - especially their jobs and their positions, they are meticulous about details and argue for arguing's sake.
Best example yet: My future boss and her secretary (who both take their positions and responsibilities very seriously) argued for about 15min about a folder, yes, a folder, and how this folder should be organized, also whether it should be a slim or a fat folder, and where exactly this particular folder should be placed on a shelf.
I was laughing and crying at the same time and just thought: "Beam me up, Scotti!Please!!"
I think I am in culture shock. I have forgotten what it was like to be a German in Germany. I feel nauseous physically and mentally.
I can just sit and watch at this stage and see how things develop. So far....not so great.
We will see what the weekend will bring.
xxx
